Sorry I haven't been keeping up on the sports front lately. I haven't been able to work up much enthusiasm. Colts lost a heart breaker to those fucking Chargers again. Tony Dungy retired. Ugh... this season was just kind of boring to me. As much as I hate Tom Brady, I think I also need him playing to make things more exciting. The beauty of the NFL this decade has been Manning vs. Brady and this season was a letdown because they didn't get to go at it. But I'm really worried for our future. I don't know shit about our new coach. Most of our best players are really getting on in years now (just retire, Marvin), etc. I think we've got another good two or three years, but after that, who knows?
On to the NBA. My favorite sport. Too bad the Pacers are as bad as ever. But we do have one huge, gigantic bright spot and that is Danny Granger. This guy is fucking amazing. He's the second best small forward in the game right now, after LeBron James. I just hope the Pacers can build a solid team to surround this guy with in the next few years. And I know this will sound nuts, but I think they need to start tanking games. Maybe they already have. But I'd like them to get in a good position for next years draft. Get a good, healthy point guard like Ricky Rubio. T.J. Ford has been excellent when healthy, but he's hardly ever healthy, so... and how about that Jarret Jack? I knew he'd be a good addition, but I'm still pissed we had to lose Jarryd Bayless. And Bayless rarely gets played on his team anyways. So I'd love to get Rubio next year. Or Blake Griffin or Greg Monroe. That guy would probably be my top choice, now that I think of it.
Ah well. Screw it. I'm still guessing a re-match between the Celtics and the Lakers for the Finals this year, LeBron will win MVP in a cake walk. I'm already done with this season. I'm looking ahead to next year and the year after. Maybe the Pacers will be a contender again.
-M
Sunday, January 25, 2009
Monday, January 19, 2009
Lost Season 5 Wish List
Lost is back, baby!! I love this show. But I think we can all agree that at times it has let us down (remember how awesome Sawyer used to be? And awesome is currently is not?) So here's my wish list for some things that I want, and want not, to happen in the upcoming season.
1. Make Locke cool again.
I love the mythology of this show. It would be the number one reason I tune in every week if not for one thing that I place above it, and that one thing is John Locke. Locke is by far the decades best character in any medium. No one character has been so compulsively watchable moreso than Locke. So you can understand why season four was sort of a drag for me. Let's do a quick re-cap.
1. Locke uses Charlie's death to gain political power over the group. He splits them in half because he feels they will be safer with him, but he did it in an underhanded fashion.
2. Locke acts like an overbearing dick.
3. Ben fucks up Lockes shit, Locke looks stupid.
4. Pretty much everyone that went with Locke died.
5. Christian tells Locke someone's got to move the island.
6. Locke dies.
Lame. So we know one thing Locke's got coming this season- his fucking death. So... things are not looking up. I just want to hold out hope though. I mean, it's not like he can be worse than he was last season. Hopefully season four was just a growing phase for Locke and whatever capacity he has this season, he'll kick ass in that capacity.
2. Enough of this love horseshit.
I don' give a fuck who Kate ends up with. No, don't let me be misunderstood now. I DON'T GIVE A FUCK WHO SHE ENDS UP WITH. And most of the hardcore fans don't care either. Any major dude will tell you the worst part of Lost is that horrid love triangle. Or quadrangle or whatever the fuck it is. Kate could have been a cool character. But her girlish wavering has made her so tedious... just let it end. End it this season. I just can't handle it anymore.
3. It's titled "Lost", not "Ben".
Look, I love Ben as much as anyone. Last season was his season, baby. There's not a better villain on t.v. (if he IS a villain... okay, he pretty much is. But I don't think he's 100% PURE evil.)
But enough is enough. Ben should not be the centerpiece of the Lost universe. The more time they devote to Ben, the more they take away from Locke's or Jack's or Sawyer's importance. There has to be a balance. Season four was so far in the Ben zone that a similar season five would reduce someone like Jack (who USED to be the star of the show, mind you) to a secondary character. We get it, Ben's smart. Ben's always one step ahead. Ben's always got a plan... but what about everyone else? Let's get back to the old days, the way things used to be, where what everyone did effected everyone else, as opposed to whatever Ben does effects everyone, everywhere.
4. Hey, remember those freighters?
Those guys seemed cool, especially Daniel and Miles. Let's, I dunno... do something with them this season? I know they didn't get to be as fully fleshed out as they were supposed to be last season because of the writers strike, but that's the past. It's time for these characters to step up to the plate and really bring it. Besides Locke, I don't think there's a character I'm more interested in right now than Miles. So let's fucking get to it fast. I don't want to have to wait until the thirteenth episode or whatever to get to see more about him.
5. Locke.
Seriously. Don't fuck up with Locke.
-Maynard
1. Make Locke cool again.
I love the mythology of this show. It would be the number one reason I tune in every week if not for one thing that I place above it, and that one thing is John Locke. Locke is by far the decades best character in any medium. No one character has been so compulsively watchable moreso than Locke. So you can understand why season four was sort of a drag for me. Let's do a quick re-cap.
1. Locke uses Charlie's death to gain political power over the group. He splits them in half because he feels they will be safer with him, but he did it in an underhanded fashion.
2. Locke acts like an overbearing dick.
3. Ben fucks up Lockes shit, Locke looks stupid.
4. Pretty much everyone that went with Locke died.
5. Christian tells Locke someone's got to move the island.
6. Locke dies.
Lame. So we know one thing Locke's got coming this season- his fucking death. So... things are not looking up. I just want to hold out hope though. I mean, it's not like he can be worse than he was last season. Hopefully season four was just a growing phase for Locke and whatever capacity he has this season, he'll kick ass in that capacity.
2. Enough of this love horseshit.
I don' give a fuck who Kate ends up with. No, don't let me be misunderstood now. I DON'T GIVE A FUCK WHO SHE ENDS UP WITH. And most of the hardcore fans don't care either. Any major dude will tell you the worst part of Lost is that horrid love triangle. Or quadrangle or whatever the fuck it is. Kate could have been a cool character. But her girlish wavering has made her so tedious... just let it end. End it this season. I just can't handle it anymore.
3. It's titled "Lost", not "Ben".
Look, I love Ben as much as anyone. Last season was his season, baby. There's not a better villain on t.v. (if he IS a villain... okay, he pretty much is. But I don't think he's 100% PURE evil.)
But enough is enough. Ben should not be the centerpiece of the Lost universe. The more time they devote to Ben, the more they take away from Locke's or Jack's or Sawyer's importance. There has to be a balance. Season four was so far in the Ben zone that a similar season five would reduce someone like Jack (who USED to be the star of the show, mind you) to a secondary character. We get it, Ben's smart. Ben's always one step ahead. Ben's always got a plan... but what about everyone else? Let's get back to the old days, the way things used to be, where what everyone did effected everyone else, as opposed to whatever Ben does effects everyone, everywhere.
4. Hey, remember those freighters?
Those guys seemed cool, especially Daniel and Miles. Let's, I dunno... do something with them this season? I know they didn't get to be as fully fleshed out as they were supposed to be last season because of the writers strike, but that's the past. It's time for these characters to step up to the plate and really bring it. Besides Locke, I don't think there's a character I'm more interested in right now than Miles. So let's fucking get to it fast. I don't want to have to wait until the thirteenth episode or whatever to get to see more about him.
5. Locke.
Seriously. Don't fuck up with Locke.
-Maynard
Friday, January 16, 2009
Where the Wild Things Are
Stumbled across these new pics of the Where the Wild Things Are movie. Spike Jonez is fucking awesome, right? This movie was supposed to have already come out, but it's been pushed back until October of this year. Apparently they had a screen testing sometime last year and it freaked a bunch of little kids out. Word on the street (I am very familiar with the word on the street, keep in mind) is that the monsters were just too fucking scary for little kids. I think they look pretty fucking cool. But whatever, it's like I always say- "Kids don't know shit. They don't even have jobs!!"
-M
-M
Thursday, January 15, 2009
REVIEW: Slumdog Millionaire
It's hard not to start this review off by citing the overwhelming love this movie is feeling. It's the front runner to win the Oscar for Best Picture and Director. It's on every major critics top ten list for best films of 2008 (and in many, many cases, it's actually their number one film of the year)
Frankly- I don't get it.
I won't get into the plot much, because there's really not much there to begin with. Jamal is a poor kid from the slums of Mumbai India. He's currently a national phenom because of his performance on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. Jamal is one question away from winning the ultimate prize. How'd he do it? He cheated. Not really. But everyone seems to think he did, so the story is told in flashback, revealing how he came to simply know the answers.
And it's bullshit. The coincidences get bigger and more absurd as the story progresses. Jamal knows who invented the revolver because he saw some dude get shot by one? Bullshit.
I'm not a cynic. I loved Forrest Gump, and the coincidences in Gump are at least as absurd as those in Slumdog, but the difference here is the writing. Gump was funny. Gump gave us characters we cared about. When something completely unbelievable happened in Gump, at least they made it funny and charming. Slumdog has no charm. Slumdog has some of the flattest, least lively characters you'll see in a film this year. Dev Patel's portrayal of Jamal is so dull and lifeless one can't help but wonder either A) Why was this kid chosen for this movie? or B) Why was an entire movie based on this character? I don't know who's the blame- the actor or the writer? The answer is probably both.
The worst part of the movie is by far the love story. You see, the whole reason Jamal is even on the show is so the love of his life, Latika, will see him. He's trying to find her, blah blah blah. Won't get into it. But basically, these two have zero spark. They seem more like a brother and sister than two star crossed lovers. And you can't help but wonder what Jamal sees in her anyways. It's not like they know each other all that well. They knew each other when they were kids, but after that they barely ever see each other. I can understand him wanting to save her from her horrible situations, but love her? He doesn't know her anymore. And she knows even less about him.
But none of that matters, cause Love Conquers All. They love each other because they love each other. That might be good enough for some people, but after they get together at the end (and I don't think that counts as a spoiler, since everyone knows how it's going to end anyways... did I mention how utterly predictable this movie is?) I couldn't help wondering, "Now what? After a month these two people are going to be sick of each other. But Latika will stick around for the money."
So the acting and writing sucks. But there are a few good points. Nice cinematography (despite the fact that anytime it shows them in the slums they completely rip off City of God), some fancy editing (which also looks a lot like City of God's editing... this movie is City of God-lite), etc. But techs can only take a movie so far. At the end of the film you're forced to face the facts- this is just an unbelievable fairytale with boring characters and a paper thin love story.
5/10.
-M
Frankly- I don't get it.
I won't get into the plot much, because there's really not much there to begin with. Jamal is a poor kid from the slums of Mumbai India. He's currently a national phenom because of his performance on Who Wants to Be a Millionaire. Jamal is one question away from winning the ultimate prize. How'd he do it? He cheated. Not really. But everyone seems to think he did, so the story is told in flashback, revealing how he came to simply know the answers.
And it's bullshit. The coincidences get bigger and more absurd as the story progresses. Jamal knows who invented the revolver because he saw some dude get shot by one? Bullshit.
I'm not a cynic. I loved Forrest Gump, and the coincidences in Gump are at least as absurd as those in Slumdog, but the difference here is the writing. Gump was funny. Gump gave us characters we cared about. When something completely unbelievable happened in Gump, at least they made it funny and charming. Slumdog has no charm. Slumdog has some of the flattest, least lively characters you'll see in a film this year. Dev Patel's portrayal of Jamal is so dull and lifeless one can't help but wonder either A) Why was this kid chosen for this movie? or B) Why was an entire movie based on this character? I don't know who's the blame- the actor or the writer? The answer is probably both.
The worst part of the movie is by far the love story. You see, the whole reason Jamal is even on the show is so the love of his life, Latika, will see him. He's trying to find her, blah blah blah. Won't get into it. But basically, these two have zero spark. They seem more like a brother and sister than two star crossed lovers. And you can't help but wonder what Jamal sees in her anyways. It's not like they know each other all that well. They knew each other when they were kids, but after that they barely ever see each other. I can understand him wanting to save her from her horrible situations, but love her? He doesn't know her anymore. And she knows even less about him.
But none of that matters, cause Love Conquers All. They love each other because they love each other. That might be good enough for some people, but after they get together at the end (and I don't think that counts as a spoiler, since everyone knows how it's going to end anyways... did I mention how utterly predictable this movie is?) I couldn't help wondering, "Now what? After a month these two people are going to be sick of each other. But Latika will stick around for the money."
So the acting and writing sucks. But there are a few good points. Nice cinematography (despite the fact that anytime it shows them in the slums they completely rip off City of God), some fancy editing (which also looks a lot like City of God's editing... this movie is City of God-lite), etc. But techs can only take a movie so far. At the end of the film you're forced to face the facts- this is just an unbelievable fairytale with boring characters and a paper thin love story.
5/10.
-M
Tuesday, January 13, 2009
Saturday, January 10, 2009
LOL OMG IMHO >:-D
Here's a video I found of news reporters getting "pwned", as it were.
Compilation of Reporters Getting Owned - Watch more News Videos
That old guy fighting with the dog is quite possibly the funniest thing I've ever seen.
-M
Compilation of Reporters Getting Owned - Watch more News Videos
That old guy fighting with the dog is quite possibly the funniest thing I've ever seen.
-M
Wednesday, January 7, 2009
Laid Off
Laid off from work for a week. Pretty amazing. Except, with all this time on my hands, I've come to realize just how boring my life is. I've got nothing to do or look forward to anymore. I generally sleep until 6:00 p.m. and then I play Call of Duty, or watch old Simpsons DVD's.
The other day I found out that someone did a mash-up of Jay-Z and Radiohead and that was about as excited as I had been in a month or so. Then I started listening to The Smiths for the first time in my life... they're pretty good.
Then... I went to Wal Mart at 4:00 a.m. last night. Started spying on all the babes. Then I went home.
I need this lay off to be over. I've got fucking nothing going on.
-M
The other day I found out that someone did a mash-up of Jay-Z and Radiohead and that was about as excited as I had been in a month or so. Then I started listening to The Smiths for the first time in my life... they're pretty good.
Then... I went to Wal Mart at 4:00 a.m. last night. Started spying on all the babes. Then I went home.
I need this lay off to be over. I've got fucking nothing going on.
-M
Saturday, January 3, 2009
Sir Charles is Class Incarnate
What follows is a police report from Charles Barkley's arrest a few days ago.
I haven't inducted anyone into The Classy's in awhile, but damned if Barkley doesn't deserve to be in my very own Hall of Fame. This guy has class coming out the ass. I love that fat, sweaty bastard.
-M
I haven't inducted anyone into The Classy's in awhile, but damned if Barkley doesn't deserve to be in my very own Hall of Fame. This guy has class coming out the ass. I love that fat, sweaty bastard.
-M
Friday, January 2, 2009
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