Lost Season 5 Wish List

Lost is back, baby!! I love this show. But I think we can all agree that at times it has let us down (remember how awesome Sawyer used to be? And awesome is currently is not?) So here's my wish list for some things that I want, and want not, to happen in the upcoming season.

1. Make Locke cool again.

I love the mythology of this show. It would be the number one reason I tune in every week if not for one thing that I place above it, and that one thing is John Locke. Locke is by far the decades best character in any medium. No one character has been so compulsively watchable moreso than Locke. So you can understand why season four was sort of a drag for me. Let's do a quick re-cap.

1. Locke uses Charlie's death to gain political power over the group. He splits them in half because he feels they will be safer with him, but he did it in an underhanded fashion.

2. Locke acts like an overbearing dick.

3. Ben fucks up Lockes shit, Locke looks stupid.

4. Pretty much everyone that went with Locke died.

5. Christian tells Locke someone's got to move the island.

6. Locke dies.

Lame. So we know one thing Locke's got coming this season- his fucking death. So... things are not looking up. I just want to hold out hope though. I mean, it's not like he can be worse than he was last season. Hopefully season four was just a growing phase for Locke and whatever capacity he has this season, he'll kick ass in that capacity.

2. Enough of this love horseshit.

I don' give a fuck who Kate ends up with. No, don't let me be misunderstood now. I DON'T GIVE A FUCK WHO SHE ENDS UP WITH. And most of the hardcore fans don't care either. Any major dude will tell you the worst part of Lost is that horrid love triangle. Or quadrangle or whatever the fuck it is. Kate could have been a cool character. But her girlish wavering has made her so tedious... just let it end. End it this season. I just can't handle it anymore.

3. It's titled "Lost", not "Ben".

Look, I love Ben as much as anyone. Last season was his season, baby. There's not a better villain on t.v. (if he IS a villain... okay, he pretty much is. But I don't think he's 100% PURE evil.)

But enough is enough. Ben should not be the centerpiece of the Lost universe. The more time they devote to Ben, the more they take away from Locke's or Jack's or Sawyer's importance. There has to be a balance. Season four was so far in the Ben zone that a similar season five would reduce someone like Jack (who USED to be the star of the show, mind you) to a secondary character. We get it, Ben's smart. Ben's always one step ahead. Ben's always got a plan... but what about everyone else? Let's get back to the old days, the way things used to be, where what everyone did effected everyone else, as opposed to whatever Ben does effects everyone, everywhere.

4. Hey, remember those freighters?

Those guys seemed cool, especially Daniel and Miles. Let's, I dunno... do something with them this season? I know they didn't get to be as fully fleshed out as they were supposed to be last season because of the writers strike, but that's the past. It's time for these characters to step up to the plate and really bring it. Besides Locke, I don't think there's a character I'm more interested in right now than Miles. So let's fucking get to it fast. I don't want to have to wait until the thirteenth episode or whatever to get to see more about him.

5. Locke.

Seriously. Don't fuck up with Locke.

-Maynard